**NOTE: I have tried for fifteen minutes to fix the “centered-ness” that comes at about 1/3 the way through this post… I can’t do it. If you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know. Everytime I do the /center thing, it doesn’t work and has vanished when I go back to edit. So, whatever.**

Howdy Buckaroos! I’m glad you’ve joined me once again so you can read all of the important things I have to say. And there are a lot.

Thursday night I had the distinct honor, nay, the privelidge of finding myself in the company of one of rock’s greatest, yet underappreciated guitar icons. I am, of course, talking about Graham Russell of Air Supply. But seriously folks… he was great.

But seriously seriously… I’m talking about Lindsey Buckingham, guitarist for Fleetwood Mac. Since he’s a good friend of mine, he decided that he would route his tour through Austin instead of Pittsburgh, since he knew I moved. (Actually, that’s a load of crap because the last time he was supposed to come to Pittsburgh to see me, he canceled his concert because Stevie Nicks (< --wow) had a "sore throat" or some garbage like that... whatever, I'm NOT over it.) "Irregardless," as we like to say a lot on television as professional broadcasters... That's neither here nor there.

Let me preface by saying... no matter what your preconceived notions about Fleetwood Mac may be, if Lindsey Buckingham comes to your town... go. You will not regret it and if you do, I'll refund your money. And I almost mean that. This is my first solo LB concert, considering the last time he did a solo tour was 1992 and I was six. (Coincidently, that was the year Lindsey begrudgingly agreed to perform with his ex-bandmates for President Clinton's innaugural celebration. If the current Clinton candidate wants more than an ice cube's chance in Hell of winning, she will select "Don't Stop" as well... Although now that I think of it, an Eagle's song comes to mind that might fit better... "Witchy Woman.") And long story short, it was a good first LB concert experience.

A couple side stories for you… I was pretty anxious to get to the concert, so I ended up arriving at the venue at about 7 p.m. The show was supposed to start at 8, so I thought I’d check out the merchandise table for a while and then take my seat. Well, they let you in the venue at 7, but you can’t go in to take your seat until 7:30. Seems stupid to me, but whatever. So I stood against a wall for a half an hour. As I was there though, I couldn’t help but overhearing some conversations… Now, I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I will… I feel like, with my almost 9 years of fan-ness, I have a pretty good handle on my Fleetwood Mac trivia. (TOOT TOOT!) In these conversations, I hear this guy talking about how his wife bought him one of Lindsey’s guitars and he wants LB to sign the back plate. This guy was completely dismayed when the stooge selling t-shirts said he couldn’t help him. Classic. It’s great seeing the light go out in people’s eyes as they realize the sun, in fact, does not revovle around them.

Anyway, I finally got to my seat. I was checking out the auditorium–I have some previous experience in this place. It’s where I took my Journalism tests in J310 my first semester at Texas. It’s a pretty cool venue that seats 1,200 so we’re talkin’ about a pretty intimate setting. Anyway, just as I’ve mentioned in my (many) airline posts, you’re really better off not people watching before you take your seat because at some point you inevitably say “Boy, I hope I’m not sitting next to that freak. Odds are on my side that I won’t be, but still.” Now, odds on a plane vs. odds in an auditorium are drastically different, but you better believe that freak with Lindsey’s guitar was sitting right next to me for the whole show. Turns out his name is Robert. He introduced me to his partner for the evening: Robert. Robert and Robert are best friends, and have been for 14 years. I know this because Robert (does it matter which?) told me 12 years… and then randomly, 10 minutes later leaned over and told me he was wrong… it was 14. At one point the Roberts were talking amongst themselves and I heard this little gem: “You know me better than my wife does.” Wow. I didn’t know whether to laugh or run. But anyway, after almost an hour of Fleetwood Mac trivia (did you know Fleetwood Mac was the first band ever to travel in jets? And every single member had their own? And Stevie’s had a grand piano in it? Yeah, me neither.) and career advice (”Don’t write anything that gets anyone killed…” WHAT?), the concert finally began!

Lindsey went a little insane there in the mid-80s… Literally and figuratively and musically with his 1984 solo release “Go Insane.” Apparently he really wanted to “sell” the concept album, so uh… he did this to himself. We all make sacrifices for art.

Lindsey took the stage alone at first. He reworked his 1981 hit “Trouble” into an acoustic version that is every bit as good as the original. The band came out on the fourth song (percussionist, guitarist and keyboard/guitar guy) and rocked out to “Second Hand News” (known to some as “lay me down in the tall grass and let me smoke my stuff). Highlights included a couple new songs from his October release “Under the Skin” and some classics that are just unebelievable live. “I’m So Afraid” can sound a little bland after the 100th time you listen to it, but live, every single time it is out of this world. He’s so impressive. From there, he transitioned into “World Turning,” “Tusk,” and “Go Your Own Way” closed out the set.

The encores started with “Holiday Road,” the theme song to Chevy Chase’s “National Lampoon’s Vacation” movie. If you know the song, you know it ends with random dog barking… Well, Lindsey didn’t disappoint! After barking like a maniac, he asked the audience if he had completely lost his dignity, to which the audience flipped out. He followed this with a new song, “Show You How” and a track from the classic Tusk album “Save Me A Place.” After that, the guitar tech, a new guy from the 2006 leg of the tour, handed Lindsey a guitar. He started playing with and realized it was the wrong one for the song he was going to play. Lindsey turned to the audience and said, “I’ll tell ya what,” and then started playing “Steal Your Heart Away” from Fleetwood Mac’s 2003 album “Say You Will.” After this, he got the guitar he was looking for originally and played “Shut Us Down” from the new album (and the soundtrack to the movie “Elizabethtown”). I don’t like this song, but performed live… he makes it so much better.

Anyway, the concert was phenomenal as you can probably tell from my rambling. I didn’t have anything for Lindsey to sign, but I had a sharpie, my cell phone and a dream. Unfortunately, Lindsey only signed albums and tossed a couple of his picks (he uses a pick on one song… kind of funny) and off the stage he went. His wife Kristen was there that night and I could see her waiting in the wings. Afterward, there were a few people milling about oustide waiting to maybe catch a glimpse of Lindsey. I decided, what the heck, I’ve got nothing better to do… So I did too. After about 20-25 minutes standing by the tour bus, I saw a group of people rushing to the back of the building. I broke into a sprint. And sure enough, there he was! Lindsey’s wife was waiting in the SUV, along with Brett Tuggle, the keyboardist/guitarist, but LB took the time to sign a few more things and even take a picture with somebody. Such a freakin’ cool guy…

Anyway, he hopped in the car and off he went. I didn’t get anything signed, but that’s okay. It was cool just to be standing there on the same level as this guy who I’ve listened to and read about for years (I’m taller than him… which probably means I weigh more than him–he’s a scrawny little guy, I never realized!). Anyway, it was an awesome night. He performed in Fort Worth Saturday night for a DVD, which will be awesome. And he’s supposed to tour on and off though July, so maybe he’ll make a trip to Pittsburgh while I’m there. Either way, another check mark in the “things I must see before I die” column.

At one point, Lindsey mentioned the band name “Fleetwood Mac”… People, of course, went nuts at the mention… Lindsey’s response: “Yeah, they’re a pretty good band.”

Weeeeeee! Well, I just finished watching the State of the Union Address and I’m just not sure I’ll ever come down from this high!!

Annnnnd done. Alright, let me just start by saying, how adorable is Dick Cheney? I mean honestly. It looks like somebody got a haircut recently and someone is looking good. Secondly, am I the only one who thought it… Cheney-Pelosi, the next hot Washington couple?? You could practically SEE the sparks!! Man. I mean, don’t tell me I was the only one shouting “get a room” at my TV? Speaking of the Madam Speaker (that’s a little play on words for ya there), it looks like California is treating her well. And by that, I mean she’s getting the GOOD botox–not that stuff you get in some tanning/nail salon combo store. Because let’s be honest, when you’re pumping poison into your face, literally inches away from your brain, you just can’t be too careful. Sadly, it’s a risk that many have to take. Seriously though, I thought Pelosi did a good job tonight. She clapped wildly, like a member from the cast of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, when there was something she agreed with (mainly for a free, gay Iraq). She also fulfilled her role as the head of the Democratic Party in an honorable fashion. I personally enjoyed watching her bug her eyes at Democrats who had fallen asleep during the speech, woke up to clapping and stood and clapped as well, only to discover it was just the Republicans clapping. If you saw this, you know what I’m talking about.

Dick being coy with his lady.

As for the others in the crowd, highlights included the lovely Hillary ROD-HAM (haha) Clinton… I think she and Pelosi might have had a bug eye competition during the speech. I can’t prove it, but all I know is that you should never be abel to see that much white in an eyeball. Secondly about the ROD-HAM, is it just me, or is she clearly growing a mullet? Now, I realize she’s running for the Presidency now and she’s trying to reach out to voters, but isn’t this a blatent attempt to appeal to voters in Appalachia and Houston (the International Headquarters for Mullet Development)? I guess some people will do anything to get elected.

Gorgeous couple, eh? This was taken by Kat’s Photography–the studio off the side of the road in that area between Vanport and Industry… in the Ohio River.

Dikembe Mutombo sat next to the first lady during the speech and rose during a heartwarming part of the speech. But more importantly… did anyone else notice the clear demonstration of a sense of humor that our government clearly has? (That is an awful sentence.) I don’t know who it was, but whoever was in charge of the seating chart for the chamber decided it would be funny to put the shortest person in the room next to the tallest. Next to Mutombo, the tiniest asian woman you’ve ever seen was standing (yes, standing–e had to verify that but upon further review, she clearly was) next to the NBA star. Classic Washington politics… following the speech, the two jello wrestled in the Senate chamber.

Once the speech concluded, Martha Raditz pushed more of her venomous opinion down the American public’s throat–thanks for that, darling. Ya know what? No one elected you to ABC News Angry Woman Correspondant post, so we don’t care to listen to your personal diatribes and vendettas against all men, the root of all evil in your pyschotic feminazi worldview.

After the brilliant insights from Martha Ratsass, Chuck Gib (long lost brother of Barry, Robin, Maurice and Andy… nevermind the spelling or actual last name of Chuck), and George Snuffleupagus, the Deomcrats had a chance to respond. Their choice? James Webb–the womanizing author who won the Senate seat of Virginia by the skin of his teeth (an amazingly close election, considering his opponent was pretty much an open bigot). I don’t know about you, but I found it hard paying attention to what he was saying. I couldn’t take my eyes off his massive forehead and helmet of hair (likely sprayed on, at least by my estimation). Not to be rude, but this is one ugly man–he’s no Dick Cheney, that’s for sure. It baffled me that they chose him, someone with no experience or any sign of cognitive function, to deliver the address for them. But alas, it wasn’t my decision to make. Personally I would have picked somebody like Carl Levin (D-Mich.)–he’s got that Dick Cheney look going on… but less healthy-looking, if you can imagine.

He has a certain Kermit the Frog look about him too, doesn’t he?

Well unfortunately the night had to come to an end at some point. Chuck Gib followed the Democrat’s response with interviews of John McCain, ROD-HAM, and Barack Obama (either Chuck was grilling him or he was a terrible interview–I’m pretty sure it was the latter because Chuck couldn’t stop drooling over him). Following the interview of each of these potential 2008 Presidential candidates, Chuck finished the interview with “It should be a really interesting year, huh? I mean really, really interesting, huh?” And then he would grab himself. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure McCain told him to calm down.

Here, braintrusts Chuck Gib and former President Bill Clinton work together to pour a glass of orange juice. Truly this demonstrates that with a little teamwork and cooperation, Americans can accomplish anything.

Well, I FREAKING typed up a post and it was basically done and I clicked in the text box and hit backspace rather quickly and it took me back a page and I lost everything. I freaking hate when this happens, and it happens way more often than I’d like to admit. So anyway… here’s what I remember:

I remember being nice at the beginning and saying welcome to 2007 and stuff. Now though, I don’t care. (Something tells me this post might be slightly edgier than the previous one I wrote…) Anyway, so it’s been like a month since my last post and since my life is soooo action packed, you’ve obviously missed a lot. Here are a few of the important things to get you up to speed.

First, Texas won their bowl game against Iowa. It was fairly exciting. Then, we had New Year’s Eve at Erika’s, which was really nice–spaghetti, gnocchi, bread, salad and then ice cream at midnight. Plus all of the cold duck (sparkling grape) you could ask for. Literally. Then, the Tusca Bechdels fell violently ill. The BCS National Championship game was a huge disappointment this year (unlike last–greatest game ever). I fell violnetly ill in my final hours at home. My flight was canceled due to ICE STORM OF DEATH 2007 here in Austin (or as we would call it in Beaver, “Sleet”). And that just about brings us up to present time.

Now I would like to comment on some current event issues that have been on my mind lately. Actually, I’m not sure if they’re current events at all or not, but whatever. I’m writing about it, so here it is.

First of all, the rock’em sock’em Dodge truck commercial needs to STOP. Now… no, not now–a month ago. You know the one I’m talking about. It has a blue and red robot and they’re boxing and then the one goes outside and punches the truck and we’re all supposed to spring from our chairs and run to the nearest Dodge dealership because “if a robot can punch a truck like that, that’s the kind of truck I need to have” apparently. They only play it 2000 times per sporting event, so if you’ve not seen it yet… uh… open your eyes once while the television is on.

Secondly, I would like to declare that a new television show (not new at all, that’s why this really isn’t a current event) is threatened the top spot on my “favorite television show” list. Obviously “Seinfeld” is a classic television show that is beyond brilliant. And while I have been watching it every day for over 4 years, I’m beginning to wonder if I’ve been missing out on something else. With that being said, this last August, I bought Kevin the first season of “Arrested Development” on dvd as per suggestions from several people. I watched my first episodes over Christmas break and then asked Kevin for discs 1 and 2 to take down to Austin with me (he’s still on disc 3). I’ve been here less than a week and have gone through the 2 discs already (okay, okay… the two snow days we had helped with that, too). It is FAN-freakin-TASTIC! I highly recommend it to everyone and if people feel moved to buy me the seasons on dvd then so be it.

Finally, the Bears beat the Saints earlier today. I was pulling for the Saints, but I have no beef against the Bears, so whatever. But as I write, the Patriots and Colts are battling it out for the AFC bid for the Superbowl. I swear, if the Patriots make it to the Superbowl again, I will FREAK OUT! Everyone knows the NFC is worthless—the Patriots winning today is as good as winning the Superbowl. Sigh… Let’s just hope Manning doesn’t choke… again.

Until we meet again…

A couple random pictures I had from Christmas…

And finally, yesterday was Eli’s Grandma’s B-Day! Sadly I missed it here in Austin, but the fam went out to eat at the Olive Garden and I’m sure they “had a gay old time,” as they say on the Flintstones.